“I’m afraid I’ll become too passive,” she said.
“I’m scared that if I rest and relax more, I won’t do the things that need to be done. That I’ll just sit on the couch and eat chips or something like that.”
I could relate to what she told me. When I started my business, I thought this is what I needed most:
Discipline.
Discipline to get out of bed on time. To take action.
I was afraid that if I didn’t motivate myself, I’d sink into lethargy and laziness. I’d be reading books all day or just do absolutely fuck all.
Turns out, that didn’t happen.
Yes, I relaxed more, but everything still got done.
But the voices that told me that I should do more and stay on top of my to-do list kept nagging me for years.
They no longer do.
Not because I worked on eradicating or reframing these thoughts.
Not because I willed them to be gone.
They just … dissolved.
Because there’s a different seeing now:
I no longer see myself as the motor behind everything I do.
I see that this motor is life itself.
(That I myself am life in action.)
I see now that actions happen.
The mind says, hey, look at that, I did that!
But when I look closely, I see that actually, I didn’t …
Life needs no motivation.
No force.
No pressure to move, move, MOVE already.
Of course, motivation is life in action, too.
It all just happens, with or without you.
“Are you breathing now?”, I asked my client.
She looked at me, confused.
“Of course I am!” she said.
“Are you doing that? If so, how?”
She was silent for a bit, and said that it was more like it just happened.
“Can you remember when you decided to work with me?” I asked.
She thought for a bit, and said yes.
“Did you make that decision?” I asked.
“Sure,” she said.
“How?” I asked.
She was silent a bit longer.
“Ehm … I don’t know? I just somehow knew that this was right.”
She paused a bit longer.
“Oh,” she said after a while.
“Maybe … that’s how everything is? It kinda … happens?”
Yes.
That’s how everything is.
With or without force, whatever happens, happens.
When you believe it’s up to you, you feel pressure.
When you realize that belief is only a conditioned thought, passing through …
You feel peace underneath the pressure.
And that pressure dissolves on its own.
And the peace that’s already here becomes the steady ground of your existence.
You stop worrying so much about needing motivation.
You notice that things still get done … with or without pressure.
You relax.
You rest.
And somehow, everything gets done.
Love,
P.S. This is exactly what shifts in private coaching.
If you’re curious, read more here.
P.P.S. Liked this blog?
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