Want something different and new? YOU have to change first.

I know, this sounds like an open door.

You know it and probably agree with it.


But are you LIVING it?

Maybe not.

Most likely because of this:


“If you want something you never had,


you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.”


Thomas Jefferson



That’s not something everyone is always willing to do.


And maybe you’re in the middle of that right now.

If you are, I’m not attacking or criticizing you.

I know I fell in this trap soooooo many times myself, too:

The trap of wanting something, but not being willing to do what it takes.



Here are some examples from myself and from countless women I’ve coached over the years:


  • Wanting to play guitar, but not being willing to stumble through the awkward phase where learning something new sucks, it sounds like shit, and the only results are bloody blisters and sore fingers;


  • Wanting a six-pack without doing ANY exercises to train your abs;


  • Wanting to quit smoking without having to give up cigarettes (and wishing someone would someday invent a healthy cigarette and promising yourself to switch to THOSE the moment they’re available);


  • Wanting more clients without having to do ANY sales, ANY marketing or ANYTHING to make your business and work visible;


  • Wanting to grow your business without being willing to do ANYTHING scary or feeling uncomfortable ever;


  • Wanting to make more money without being willing to change your mindset, your actions, your habits, your attitude and your behavior in whatever area you need to make changes in. (And not even being willing to LOOK at what you might need to do or believe differently.)




If you say you want something, you can only GET IT when you DO THE WORK:


The inner work, of facing your fears and doubts and moving forward in spite of them.

Of feeling uncomfortable or scared to death and doing what you’re called to do anyway.

Of letting go of habits and patterns, stories and beliefs that no longer serve you – even if they feel comfortable, and even if it scares you to let go of them.

Of opening up to AND IMPLEMENTING new habits, new behaviors.

Of making new decisions.

Of continuously choosing your dreams over your fears.



The outer work, of doing WHATEVER it takes WHENEVER it’s needed – daily, weekly, monthly, wheneverly.

Of putting time, effort, energy and yes, often money, in it.

Of taking action even when it feels uncomfortable or scary or makes you want to scream.



If you don’t want to ever risk anything, don’t want to do anything that feels scary or uncomfortable, aren’t willing to do new things, explore new things, learn new things, implement new behavior, and you’re not willing to feel uncomfortable, that’s fine.

As long as you know what the inevitable consequence is:


You. Will. NOT. Get. Whatever. It. Is. That. You. Say. You. Want.

Your. Business. Will. Not. Grow. And. Probably. Not. Even. Survive.



And this WILL NOT change until and unless YOU change.

Whining won’t help.

Feeling sorry for yourself won’t help.

Feeling (and acting) like a victim won’t help.

Wishful thinking won’t help.

Feeling entitled to whatever it is you want won’t help.



The good news is, that ALL of this is in YOUR hands!

YOU determine if you’re willing to change – or not.

YOU determine what you do, when you do it, if you do it, and why you do it.

YOU determine if you’re pro-active or reactive.

YOU determine what you’re (not) willing to change and let go of.

And YOU determine if and when you truly GO for something.



It’s not my intention to judge you or tell you there’s something wrong with you.

And I’m also not saying that you’re to blame or at fault if there’s something you want you don’t have yet!

It’s absolutely possible to want something, to be ALL IN, and to STILL not get it.

You can’t control everything.

And you don’t always get what you want.


I AM saying to be honest with yourself, though: 

IF there is something you SAY you want that you’re not getting (yet), ask yourself:


Are you TRULY all in?

Are you doing EVERYTHING you KNOW you have to do?

Are you putting in the time, the effort, the money, the inner work, and the outer work, CONSISTENTLY?


Or….aren’t you?


There is no wrong or right choice.

There’s only choice and consequence, action and result.

If you’re not willing to change anything?

The consequence is that NOTHNG will change and you will NOT get what you SAY you want.


If you’re willing to change and you actually ACT UPON that, consistently?

Your circumstances and results WILL change.


There’s NEVER a guarantee you will always get what you want, when you want it, in the exact way you want.


And you will NOT get what you want if YOU are not willing to change first.



The choice is yours. Always.  

Do what you know, baby.

There’s ALWAYS something.


To stepping up into your full POWER,


© Brigitte van Tuijl



P.S.: Sometimes feel like there’s some invisible force stopping you from being all in and GOing for your goals & dreams?

And you’re not sure what it is or how to break through it? Or you wish moving forward would be easier, and not always such a struggle?

A Soul Blueprint Reading, Clearing & Realignment might be just what you need.

You get clarity on who you are at the level of your soul; what your Divine Gift is; which blocks & restrictions stand in the way of expressing them fully; AND those blocks are cleared, too!

You can read all about & book your reading here.

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