This morning, I found myself distracted by something I read on Facebook.

It was a blog from someone that was very clearly, how shall I put it, ‘inspired’ by the work of someone else. (Bordering on stealing someone else’s work.)

I felt something tighten and curl up inside me.


And instantly knew what it was:

Hello fear!

I have enough experience with you to recognize you in whatever form you sneak up on me.

Today, you tried to hide behind the mask of righteousness:

“It’s just not DONE to steal other people’s work! Do your own fucking thing, yo! It’s dishonest and disrespectful and stupid on top of that, too!”




I felt bad because my buttons got pushed.


And I know what to do when that happens:

Explore. Question. Go inside and see what’s REALLY going on.

When I asked myself that very question (“what’s REALLY going on here?”), the answers came up immediately.


These buttons got pushed:

#1: A DEEP desire to express my own unique message;

#2: The feeling that I’m not doing that enough, and

#3: The fear that when I do, others will copy & steal MY work, push me out of the way, and take up MY space in this world.


Or, in other words: the fear that there’s no place for me nor my business.

A very old fear I don’t even rationally believe. But apparently, it’s still active somewhere – and now that I’m making progress with my book (more on that another time), the remnants of this fear get activated again.


Once I saw what was going on, the solution was easy to see, too:


#1: To bring my full attention back to ME: to explore what’s going on, and uncover what bothers me exactly. And to fully focus on MY own soul work, and see how I can do more of that.


#2: To keep working on my upcoming book. (More on that in another blog.) To make that a DAILY priority, and START my day with it – instead of waiting to see how much time is left after I’ve done other things first.


#3: To remind myself that I’m already expressing myself and my message fully & authentically. And to constantly be aware of my next level of self-expression, and to step into that each and every time. (Because there’s ALWAYS is a next level for EVERYTHING.)


#4: To realize that the ONLY reason I now feel like I’m not expressing myself enough, is because I haven’t published my book yet. And the only thing that will solve that, is point 2: to make working on my book a DAILY PRIORITY.


#5: To remind myself that this fear of there not being space for me, a place for me, on this planet, is complete and utter bullshit. I don’t have to ‘earn’ my spot on this planet. (Not does anyone else!!!)

And this place is as big OR as small as I decide it is, because it has NOTHING to do with an actual place in the outside world, and EVERYTHING to do with how FREE I FEEL INSIDE TO BE WHO I AM AND DO WHAT I WANT TO DO.



It didn’t take long to do this inner work, and shift myself back into feeling completely good and at peace again.

And it inspired me to write this blog, too.

Which makes it at least doubly worth the time I put into it 🙂



So, what’s in my story for you? Besides whatever you took away from it already?



Take-away #1: When your buttons get pushed, your fears flare up, your doubts creep in: go INSIDE.

Shift your attention AWAY from the other person or situation, and turn your full attention on YOURSELF. What’s really going on? What exactly gets triggered? What do you fear? What pain gets activated?


Take-away #2: Distracting yourself from what you feel, or trying to ignore or suppress it, NEVER works.

In the short run, maybe. But whatever got triggered inside you, is STILL THERE. And it WILL flare up another time, in another situation, about another person. It comes back, holds you back, and makes you feel bad UNTIL YOU ADDRESS IT.


Take-away #3: Don’t just ask yourself what’s going on.

Take the next step as well: what can you now DO with what you’ve learned? What new actions can you take, what new decisions can you make? What can you let go of now? What can you embrace? How does this help you step into more joy, more fulfillment, more love, more success, more ease – or whatever it is you’d like to see more of in your life?


Take-away #4: Check: Are YOU fully focusing on doing YOUR soul work, in YOUR own way? Are you giving that the energy and attention you want to give it? If not: what needs to change? How can you make this a priority?


Hint: if you’re NOT doing that at all or not enough, your soul will ALWAYS find ways to tap you on your shoulder, to try and get your attention, until you listen.

And ONE of the ways you can recognize that your soul is trying to get your attention? Is noticing how you FEEL. If something, ANYTHING, makes you feel bad: there’s something not aligned with your soul, your truth, with who you truly are. You’re either believing something that’s not true for you (anymore), doing something that’s not in your highest good, or making a decision that’s not aligned with your soul.)


Take-away #5: What’s keeping you from FULLY going for your soul work, the things you most deeply desire, the true dream you have for your business?

What fears or doubts are blocking your path? Examine them. Explore what’s going on. Look them in the eye. Fears do NOT get bigger when you look at them.

For a couple of seconds, yes, it might feel like you drown in them. But you won’t. Keep breathing. Remind yourself that YOU are in control, NOT your fears.



You can either focus your energy, attention and time on the things you WANT to manifest and spend your time (your life!) on.

OR you can focus your energy, attention and time on whatever keeps you AWAY from doing what you want: your fears, your doubts, your distractions and addictions and excuses and all the things you don’t want or don’t have or don’t feel capable or scared of.


It’s ALWAYS your choice.

Your buttons can only be pushed as far as you ALLOW them to get pushed.

Nothing can keep you from expressing yourself and your soul in your business: no other person. No external situation. No fear. No doubt. Nothing can stop you but you.


And every time you feel bad, your fears get triggered, your pains flare up, you can choose to use this as an opportunity to learn, to grow, to heal, and to take a step forward.

To healing, growth, and being true to YOU,


© Brigitte van Tuijl


P.S.: On a somewhat related note:

My brand new service is here!

Soul Blueprint Reading, Clearing & Realignment

This is for you if:

You’re a woman entrepreneur who wants to build a thriving, soulful business based on your purpose & who you truly are.

You want your business to be an expression of you.

You want to make money doing the things you love, the things that matter and are meaningful to you. 


This Soul Blueprint Reading, Clearing & Realignment will bring you:


  • A clear insight in who you truly are and were always meant to be, at the level of your soul;


  • You learn what your Divine Gift is (the gift that’s part of who you are, of the essence of you – the gift that must be expressed in your business & life for you to be able to thrive);


  • You learn what your blocks & restrictions are that stand in the way of fully being true to who you really are, and tapping into your gift fully & freely;


  • A complete clearing of these blocks & restrictions;


  • Your personal homework & action steps that helps you anchor this clearing into your daily life – AND helps you create more of what you want!



This powerful work opens the door for you to be true to who you really are, in every area of your life – and to create more abundance, joy, and a thriving business, too!

It gives you a deeper understanding of who you are and what’s a natural fit for your soul, and what YOU need to feel happy, fulfilled AND allow your business to thrive.

It gives you a boost of energy and clarity, and opens up a space for you to BE and DO differently, in full alignment with your soul.

And experience a new reality with new (and better) results in your business and life.

You can read all about AND book your reading here. 

And maybe I talk to you soon!

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