I used to hate sales for a long time.

With a vengeance, I might add 😉

Of course, I wanted to get clients and make money, but I wanted them to just come find ME instead of me jumping through hoops to find them – because that was what selling felt like to me:

Chasing after people, shouting ‘COME BUY MY SHIT, YO!’ in their ears, badgering them until they finally caved, or deleted me from their life forever.


I avoided it like the plague.

And got matching results:

Not enough clients.

Which meant not enough money.

AND not enough freedom & fulfillment. Two things that were even more important to me than money.


Thankfully, I changed that.

I no longer think selling is sleazy, it no longer makes me feel icky, and I’m not half bad at it anymore either.


How I shifted that?

Is partly the result of everything I since then learned about sales.

Is partly the result of finding my own ways of marketing & sales that feel good AND work for me.

And is MOSTLY the result of some inner shifts I made in my mindset around sales.


These are the two inner shifts that made the biggest difference for me – maybe they help shift something inside you, too:


Shift #1:

Selling is not something you do TO people –it’s a win-win for both of you. (Even when they say NO!)

When you don’t deliver your service or product to people, you can’t offer them the full benefit and transformation of your work.

Sure, they can read your blog or sign up for your freebies.

But the REAL results? Come from actually working with you or buying your product.

(And then, of course, IMPLEMENTING and USING it – but that’s up to them and out of your hands.)

If you don’t sell your stuff, you can’t REALLY make a difference. (And if you give it away for free? You can’t make a living.)


Your potential client is already looking for whatever solution or product you offer.

You’re not tricking them into buying something they don’t want or need!

(Unless you CHOOSE to trick them, of course – see shift #2.)

You’re offering them something that can help them, and they are then free to say YES or NO to it next.

No pressure. No chasing.

If they say YES you both win – they get something they want, and you too: a new client, the feeling of fulfillment that you now make a difference for someone, and money in the bank.

If they say NO you both win – they are free to look for another solution or product, and you’re free to welcome in someone else who’s the perfect fit for you and your work.



Shift #2:

Selling has the energy YOU put into it: it’s only sleazy or dirty if YOUR INTENTIONS are sleazy or dirty.

(And guess who decides how you act and what your intentions are?!)

Yes, there are sleazy and dishonest people who’d do ANYTHING to make money, from lying or stealing or killing to manipulating, etc.

But that doesn’t mean YOU have to sell in ways that feel bad to you.

YOU decide how you choose to sell.

YOU decide which values and ethics are important to you.


And YOU decide to align your marketing & sales to your values, beliefs and personality.

Or not.



You are responsible for your intentions & actions. And what others feel or think about that? Is OUT OF YOUR HANDS. 

If it feels good to you to offer an early bird discount, and it’s perfectly aligned with your values, your beliefs, and your soul?

Do it.

If it doesn’t?

Don’t do it.


Some people might see this as a sleazy tactic to put pressure on them.

Some people might not give a shit about it at all.

And others might feel grateful that you’re helping them over the threshold – with a discount on top!


You cannot control how people look at you, feel about you, and think about you.

You DO fully control what you do, why you do it, how you do it, if you do it, and your intention and energy behind it.

Make sure you sell in alignment with your own values, personality and soul – and you no longer feel weird or bad about it.


What – if anything – do you resist or dislike about sales?

And how is that impacting your results & how you feel about your business?


There’s a direct link between those.

To selling and serving in YOUR own way!


© Brigitte van Tuijl



Would you like to increase your sales AND feel better about it, too?

Start on the inside: with clearing your blocks that stand in the way of getting more sales.

And by changing your beliefs and stories you have about sales that no longer serve you.

Not sure how to do that or where to start?

Join me in RISE, my online business healing program for women entrepreneurs 

The topic for September is ALL about sales:

Soulful Sales – the energetic foundation to sell more so you can serve more.
(whether you sell a service, product, idea, message or anything else you wish to share from the heart.)

You receive a masterclass that helps you shift your mindset.

And receive additional healings that help you attract more sales AND clear invisible blocks you have around sales.

This clears the path for you to take new actions AND create new results.

If you read this on or after October 1?

Check out the new topic for the current month. 

That topic might speak to you even more 😉


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