At the beginning of 2013 I turned myself from a Crappy Hermit into a Happy Hermit.

Meaning: I made sure my business FULLY supported the fact that I’m a hermit who needs to spend about 75-90% alone in order to be happy and fulfilled.

Which, in a practical way, meant that I decided to make NO MORE than 4 appointments where I have direct interaction with people per week.

(And still grow my income, impact and reach at the same time!)

The appointments include EVERY kind of call or appointment you can possibly have that is business related:

1-1 coaching calls; group coaching calls; sales conversations; networking calls with other women business owners; calls with my team or bookkeeper; etc.

I wrote all about WHY I made this decision and how I struggled with it in November 2012. You can read that blog here.


I STILL get emails and reactions from people on that blog.

So I decided to write another update to let you know how it’s going now, and what I’ve learned.

AND how what I’ve learned and experienced is relevant for YOU.


First of all:

I still honor my Happy Hermit regime. (With one little change – I even lowered the amount of appointments.)

I grew my income, impact and reach.

AND I feel completely happy about all the changes.

I’m now a Very Happy Hermit 😉


Here’s what I’ve learned from implementing my Happy Hermit Regime and how that’s relevant for you:


Learning #1

I only feel FULLY free to share my gifts, grow my business & income, since my business is 100% aligned and in integrity with my true self.

Aka since I’ve implemented this Happy Hermit schedule.

Aka since I’ve built my ENTIRE business for 100% around ME.

Not around my clients.

Not around my offerings.

Not around what I thought was possible.

And definitely NOT around what most people think is possible, wanted, normal, expected, or simply how it ‘should be because that’s just the way it is when you’re a coach and/or an entrepreneur.’


That’s why my business has grown even though I hardly make appointments – which, when you’re a coach, ALSO means you spend less time doing an activity that makes you money: coaching.

And why I’m happier than I’ve ever felt before.


How this is relevant for you:

There’s nothing wrong with compromising on things that don’t deeply matter to you.

There’s EVERYTHING wrong with compromising on ANYTHING that you absolutely need to feel happy & fulfilled, because you’re naturally wired that way.

It will either slowly suffocate your soul, so you never feel fully happy and fulfilled.

OR it will stop you from growing your business and fulfilling your purpose, because you’re not willing to pay the price of changing who you are.


If YOU want to feel COMPLETELY free to live your purpose to its fullest AND enjoy doing that, you have to live in full alignment with whatever it is YOU absolutely need to feel happy & fulfilled.

And build your ENTIRE business around it.


Learning #2:

I initially thought it was perfect to have 4 appointments per week, every week.

Turns out, it’s not.

I prefer LESS than 4 appointments per week.

And when I’m in creative mode, 2 is the maximum.

Right now, I’m creating a new program, a new FREE masterclass, and am working on my next book.

For me, that requires A LOT of extra silence, quiet, mental space, and alone time.

Until these babies are launched, I don’t make more than 2 appointments per week.


How this is relevant for you:

What you want and need changes over time.

Don’t be afraid to play with it. It’s OK to change your mind.

You can ALWAYS make changes.

The most important thing is that you start somewhere.

Even if you don’t really know how or aren’t sure it’s even possible yet.

You REALLY never know what’s possible until you GO for it.



If you live in alignment and integrity with who you really are, you can ALWAYS find a way to build your business around it in a way that also allows you to grow your income, impact and reach.

You’re meant to fulfill your purpose.

You’re not meant to struggle, change who you are, or do things you hate in order to fulfill it.

Unleash your TRUE self and build your entire business around it, and you’ll experience MORE flow than ever before!


Learning #3

When I look back at how I naturally spent my time before school and all the other rigid structures we’re all forced into started to fuck that up, I see a 100% resemblance with how I naturally spend my time today.

As a kid, nothing made me happier than to read a book and just BE, in my own cocoon.

Every now and then, some kind of activity bubbled up (playing outside, for example). And when I was done with that, I went back inside and read a book again. Or stared at the sky, wrote little poems, or came up with a game I could play alone.

When I look at who I am and how I naturally prefer to live today, NOTHING has changed.


By honoring who I truly am and what my soul needs, how I naturally spend my time looks EXACTLY the same as when I was a kid.

Makes sense, of course, right?

Your true nature never goes away.


How this is relevant for you:

Not sure if you’re living in complete integrity with your true nature?

Or what it looks like when you are?

Look back at how you naturally spent your time when you where a kid and were still free & left alone to BE who you are.

Before schools and grown ups and the rules and messages of society about who you should be, what you should do, and how you should do that got a hold on you.

What did that look like?

What type of activities did you most enjoy?

How much time did you naturally like to be on your own, and how much time did you like to interact with others?

What did you most enjoy doing?


And does the way you now live and work resemble that?

If not, you already know because you feel unfulfilled, tired, unsatisfied or annoyed with how certain things are right now.

Don’t let that continue.

Make a list of what you’d like to add, change, or delete from your life or biz all together.

And start ACTING upon that.

You don’t have to be as uncompromising as I am, unless that serves you, too.

And you don’t have to change it all at once.


But at least start honoring your wants, wishes and needs more than you do right now.

Sink deeper into yourself even more than you’re already doing.


Being your own boss gives you TONS of freedom to live and work any which way you please.

USE that freedom.

You’ll be so much better of.

And your business will be, too!!


© Brigitte van Tuijl

P.S.: Want to do EVERYTHING in business & life YOUR way, too, without compromising, sacrificing or changing who you are?

Want help, support, guidance & inspiration from me and a community of like-minded women to finally be 100% true to YOU?

My 1-1 coaching might be just what you need.


Curious to read what’s next?

In 2017 I gave myself even more space: here you can read how I added one hermit week per month to my schedule. 

One completely appointment-free week each month, baby! 😉

UPDATE 2022: 

I wrote a book about it!

The Happy Hermit – how to thrive as an introvert entrepreneur

In it, I share my journey in more detail and, more importantly, how YOU can create a business that’s 100% ideal for YOU, too!

Expected: summer 2022

You can read all about it here. 


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