I just read an amazing article by Carol Tuttle on if your inner child may be sabotaging your success. (the link to the article is on the bottom of this blog)
I see this wounded inner child play out in business too, when people unconsciously try to get their deepest inner needs fulfilled by their clients.
These emotional needs can show up for example as:
- An overall neediness for people to buy from you and say yes to you in sales conversations (which goes deeper than feeling you need the money: it’s about feeling personally rejected on a deep level when someone says no to you);
- Needing your clients to get results (or else you immediately start doubting your own worth on a very deep level);
- Feeling rejected and worthless whenever someone unsubscribes from your list; etc.
And because people unconsciously expect their clients to fulfill these inner needs, their behavior comes from a place of neediness or lack:
They try to behave in a way that makes others like and love them (like a child trying to buy friendship by giving everyone candy) – and this is never who you truly are.
This behavior can show up as:
- Over giving;
- Taking on responsibilities that aren’t yours but your client’s (and doing their work FOR them, which doesn’t help or empower them);
- Trying to constantly please your clients, even if this is at your own expense or prevents you from giving your clients what THEY need;
- Not speaking your truth fearing people will reject your for it;
- Holding back because you’re afraid people won’t like or leave you when you don’t;
- Not being true to YOU in your business, and trying to be someone you’re not to be accepted, liked, loved or successful.
This is not behavior that comes from your deepest power connected to your soul.
It’s behavior that comes from fear, lack and being in survival mode.
And: it doesn’t work.
NO ONE can heal your inner wounds or fulfill your inner needs but you.
Plus it even repels clients: they sense your neediness and get the hell away from you.
No one wants to feel that underlying clinginess, that neediness, the feeling that someone is constantly looking for their praise and approval – the feeling that you can’t be truly happy unless they do something specific or be a certain way.
[clickToTweet tweet=”Your biz suffers when you have inner wounds that play out in your biz. It blocks your success. ” quote=”Your biz suffers when you have inner wounds that play out in your biz. It blocks your success. ” theme=”style1″]
If some type of inner wound or neediness unconsciously drives your behavior in your business, coaching or marketing, you’re blocking your success.
And do the exercise.
Healing these inner wounds (which we all have to some extend) is very freeing, and puts you back in charge of your own life AND business.
It helps you come from power and trust.
It helps you shine.
And it helps you be unapologetically YOU in business and life!
Let me know what you think! Anything resonates? Recognize something?
You can post your comment below.
P.S.: Still feel stuck somehow and not sure how to break through that?
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