It’s great to think and dream big. (Whatever big means to you – it’s a feeling more than something measurable).

It lights you up and fills you with enthusiasm. It feels sooo good.

Oh joy! Oh bliss!



Oh fuck!

…your fears and doubts get triggered and everything comes to a screeching halt.

Every time I coach my clients to connect to the bigger mission they have for their business, I see them go through the same phases:


Phase 1: WOW! This is great. Jeez. Wouldn’t it be awesome if I could really do this?!

They’re fired up and ready to go. They take a step. And another.

And then….phase 2 kicks in:

Man. Who am I kidding. This is too big. I can’t do this. Who do I think I am? This is HARD! Fuck it. I’m not even sure this is what I really want.


This. Always. Happens. To. People. Who. Have. A. Big.Dream.

(And again: ‘big’ refers to how it feels for you. What felt like a BIG step for me 3 years ago is a piece of cake for me now. And what feels like a BIG step for me now will be easy next year.)
Back to the issue at hand: WHY does this happen? And WHY does it happen every single time you move forward and stretch yourself?

Here’s why:

Dreams trigger fears. They trigger doubts. They trigger all kinds of stories and beliefs you have about yourself, what’s possible for you, your worthiness and your capabilities. They trigger fears around money and visibility.


The bigger your dream, the bigger your fears. Which is the reason a lot of people don’t even DARE to dream big.

Their fears are triggered when they think a little bit outside of their comfort zone, and they immediately step back.

They don’t want to feel the fear. They don’t like feeling uncomfortable. And they give up before they even start.


Others DO dream big, and take action to turn that dream into reality.

And then…they encounter their fears and doubts after they’ve taken a couple of steps, or after they’ve been working on their goal for a while.


The first response most people have when they’re confronted with fear, is to step back.

They step back, hold back, and start taking less action.


Trust me, I KNOW. I go through this EVERY TIME I move forward into a new level.

Just went through it again, as a result of deciding to step it up again, so I can grow to the next level of my business. It wasn’t fun. And it wasn’t easy.

But hey, that’s business, and that’s life. It’s messy and painful sometimes.

I got through it, again. Lots of people go through it, again and again and again.


And YOU can get through it as well. Here’s how:

Grow into your bigger self

When you feel fear and doubts, you can either:

Shrink, allow your fears to take over, and step back into your comfort zone.


You can grow into a bigger, braver version of yourself.

Wouldn’t it be great if you did?


Just imagine what’s possible for you and your business when you grow into your OWN next level…

This is a step-by-step process, of course. You don’t just step into it within 5 minutes and that’s it.

But that’s OK. Allow it to be a process of growth. Allow yourself to take one step forward and then maybe 3 steps back. Allow yourself to fall down, make mistakes, cry, swear, whatever comes up.

Just keep moving forward. Keep taking steps – tiny little baby steps if that’s all you can handle.

That’s all it takes. And you CAN do this. I know you can!


This week’s transformational action:


What kind of person is this bigger version of you?

Who is she? What does she believe? What is she confident about? What does she do? How does she do that?


Start feeling, deciding and behaving like your bigger self RIGHT NOW.

Whenever you need to do or decide something, ask yourself:

What would my bigger self do? How would she handle this? How would she react?

Whatever answer comes up:

Take a deep breath. And DO it.


Bonus tip:

Get help and support. Hire a coach or mentor, join a Mastermind group – whatever you do, do NOT do it alone.

“Failure you can do alone. Success always takes help.”

Simon Sinek



© 2013 Brigitte van Tuijl



P.S. Do you need support to take a leap into growth, and take your business to the next level?

My one-on-one coaching may be just what you need. You can read all about it and apply for your spot here:


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