Over the past couple of months, I noticed subtle signs of things not being in the flow. Answers not coming through. Indecisiveness. Resentment.
I thought I was tired, and needed a break. I let it rest. But it didn’t feel good. Something was off. And it slowly began to feel worse.
Last week, I felt stuck and unhappy.
And I had NO clue what was wrong or how to fix it.
So I asked the universe to help me see what I was not seeing.
The next day, a very dear friend of mine called me out of the blue.
She said: there’s something I feel I should tell you. Do you want to hear it?
I instantly knew this was the help I asked the universe for.
So I said ‘yes!’ And then she told me loud and clear that right now, I was not going for my true dream. I was not committed to what I most desired.
Damn. She was right. I wasn’t.
I first connected to my true dream in 2008, when I asked myself: what’s the next level of my business?
What is it I TRULY want to build?
The answer was immediately clear: I want to build an information & inspiration empire that inspires millions of women worldwide!
Holy fucking shit.
That felt SO big and bold and out of reach it knocked the wind right out of me.
So I buried that dream.
Only to find out that burying your deepest dream is impossible: it keeps coming back.
So I finally listened in 2012:
I changed my audience, all of my programs & services, and started working in English, so I could serve clients globally.
I was acting on PART of my dream, and worked on it ever since.
But I didn’t act upon the ENTIRE dream:
I wasn’t focused on building an information & inspiration empire.
I was building a coaching business instead.
Yes, I love the things I do and the people I work with.
And yes, I’ve build my entire business around who I truly am: a hermit who needs to be and work alone most of the time. I successfully turned myself from a crappy hermit into a happy hermit.
Kudos for me. I’m doing business for 100% on my terms and made it work.
But still. I’m building a coaching business.
And what am I NOT spending my time on?
Creating. Writing books. And whatever else I feel like creating and play with.
I’m NOT building an information & inspiration empire.
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
Why am I STILL not doing that?
Because, in my core, I still don’t fully believe there’s a place for me here on planet earth.
A part of me still doesn’t believe I’m truly welcome and I have a right to be here. And because deep down I never felt I have a right to be here, a right to BE, I found it hard to believe it was OK for me to get what I so deeply want.
I didn’t feel I deserved to actually receive it.
And there’s no use in going after something you can never get, right?
(On a subconscious level, conclusions like these always make perfect sense.)
Now don’t get me wrong: it’s not that I haven’t been living my dream at all.
I just haven’t been living it for 100%.
I haven’t been fully committed. I haven’t been all in.
I haven’t been honoring ALL of my dreams. I haven’t been honoring ALL of ME.
That ends right here, right now.
I OWN my dream, I CLAIM my dream, I LIVE my dream, and I now ALLOW myself to get every single damn thing I’ve been dreaming of for so long.
So what does that change in my business?
I still love the things that I do and the people I work with.
The only thing that changes is this: I STOP burying my dream.
I STOP putting off what I want to do most: writing books. Playing and creating whatever the fuck I’m inspired to create.
And every decision I make from now on is made from this very clear focus:
I’m building an information & inspiration empire. Not a coaching business.
Small difference. Totally different focus & energy.
And I’m NEVER shrinking back from my true dreams and calling EVER again.
So. What’s in all of this for YOU?
Why am I sharing this, if not much is going to change in my business and you probably won’t see any difference, besides it suddenly raining books from my hand? (Well…raining…you know. Let’s start with one book first.)
I’m sharing this because I KNOW that SO many women aren’t honoring or going for their deepest dream.
And maybe you’re one of them.
Your deepest dream may be different than mine.
And the deepest reason you’re not fully committed to it may be different as well.
But YOU have a true calling and a deep desire too.
Are you honoring it? Are you committed to it? Are you bringing it to life, step by step?
If not, please know this:
Whatever you need to fulfill your desires, is already within your reach.
You DON’T have to know HOW you’ll accomplish it yet.
Your first step is to say YES to yourself, your calling, your purpose, your dream.
The HOW will unfold once you do.
“The answer to HOW is YES.” ~ Peter Block.
What is it YOU truly want to build or do?
Believe me, deep down, you already know what you REALLY dream of.
It excites you, lights you up, warms you up, makes you smile, and you feel that YES, this is what you’d do if nothing scared you and you were sure you couldn’t fail.
(And after the initial excitement settles down, it usually feels like it’s too big for you and you wonder how you’re ever gonna make it happen.)
Remember: the answer to HOW is YES.
So dream and say YES!
Once you do, your path will become clear. And you’ll know what to do next.
To celebrating life, living your dreams, and not shrinking back from your deepest desires.
You’ve got this!
P.S. Have a deep, true business dream you’re finally choosing to GO for? Need help with that? If you’re an experienced women entrepreneur, my 1-1 coaching might be a perfect fit. You can read all about it here.